Hey Mister where ya headed? Are you in a hurry? I need a lift to happy hour Say oh no Do you brake for distilled spirits I need a break as well The well that inebriates the guilt One, two, one, two, three, four Cold turkey's getting stale Tonight I'm eating crow Fermented salmonella Poison oak, no There's a drought at the fountain of youth And now I'm dehydrating My tounge is swelling up I say one, two, one, two, three, four Trouble times You know I cannot lie I'm off the wagon and I'm hitchin a ride There's a drought at the fountain of youth And now I'm dehydrating My tounge is swelling up I say Shy Touble times You know I cannot lie I'm off the wagon and I'm hitchin a ride Don't know where I'm goin Hitchin a ride