And all that could have been...

Can't you see the real me?

и тащит!

I still recall the taste of your tears.
Echoing your voice just like the ringing in my ears.
My favorite dreams of you still wash ashore.
Scraping through my head 'till I don't want to sleep anymore.

You always were the one to show me how
Back then I couldn't do the things that I can do now.
This thing is slowly taking me apart.
Grey would be the color if I had a heart.

In this place it seems like such a shame.
Though it all looks different now, I know it's still the same
Everywhere I look you're all I see.
Just a fading reminder of who I used to be.

I wanna know everything.
I wanna be everywhere.
I wanna fuck everyone in the world.
I wanna do something that matters.

Go fuck yourself

Don't you want people to love you?
My spanking, that's the only thing i want so much. Why is that better than being hugged? Because you get closer to the person. Just like a person having sex feels cared for. We wanna be loved, so we have sex together. And they feel loved about that. And this is the way it makes me feel... loved. I want it, i dream about it, i think about it, i want it. Just like a girl wants sex with a boy, you know? It's the way i'll always be probably...
My last one was born in the system. See, they're stupid, very stupid, those people over there they're stupid. These people are so below mentality, honest to god, really. You know what i mean, he got the nerve to bug me. Everything seems so eight ball.
And i, i don't know if that's my imagination, but, umm... hey foxymophandlemama, that's me. Think they got me. It's a lovely stupid mop, it is. There's something really screwey about no streaking. Is it any old dumb mop? It streaks. Come on mop, no streaking mop. I don't mind mop the floor, my mop streaks, i don't like it; it's not me, it's the mop. I bought some new mops. Go away you stupid, dumb old sponge mop. I don't believe it, now the floor looks beautiful. You're right, this mop's stupid. Dumb old sponge mop.
In two weeks, before she could see herself not dressed the twenty-third of may you know she disturbed no one today. The manager told her to completely forget.
If you ever go to bed, i'll kill you. Do i tell the whole world that i'm mentally ill? I want to show them that i can walk on my own without hands of theirs and, i can still fantasize, but i keep it to myself... keep it to myself...keep it to myself.
I think i deserve to be loved, don't you? Very much so, but i keep it to myself. And, i can still fantasize, but i keep it to myself. Do you ever think that you would actually, really kill yourself? Well, if i have thought about it real, uhh, real deep; yes, i believe i would.

My sick imagination works.

Just look and you'll see me lying there.
Farewell.

I fucked your girlfriend last night. While you snored and drooled, I fucked your love. She called me Daddy. And I called her baby when I smacked her ass. I called her sugar when I ate her alive till daylight. And I slept with her all over me, from forehead to ribcage I dripped her ass. Sometimes I thought you might be spying, living out some brash fantasy, but no. You were knocked out. But we were all knocked out you know. In a way...
I serve too many masters.
We didn't know you'd break the bottle that the magic came in to use those jagged shards to slit our wrists and neck. And you'd do it too, you're that kind of dude. But you wouldn't know what you were doing because I didn't. Your girlfriend could have been a victim, an amputee, a dead body. But god damn I wanted to fuck.
I'm losing what's left of my fucking mind, I serve too many fucking masters.
(I told you. I told you motherfucker)

Lose me
Hate me
Smash me
Erase me
KILL me

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q-HH7b-tjGY

I got my propaganda
I got revisionism
I got my violence
In hi-def ultra-realism

Trying, lying, defying, denying, crying and dying. Where is everybody?
God have mercy on our souls; on our dirty little hearts.

This is the year where hope fails you. The test subjects run the experiments. And the bastards you know, is the hero you hate. But cohesion is possible if we strive. There's no reason, there's no lesson, no time like the present, telling you right now: 'What have you got to lose, what have you got to lose, except your soul?'

I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything

I wear this crown of shit
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time
The feelings disappear
You're with someone else
I am still right here

What have I become?
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away in the end

You could have it all
My empire of dirt
I won't let you down
I won't make you hurt
If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way


P.S. You make this all go away. I'm down to just one thing, i've started to scare myself.