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When I was young, I was a very happy kid. I played around with other children, had many friends, and while I was slightly shy, I still had no problem talking to people. As I grew up, I learned that being chubby and smart made people dislike me for my appearance and envy me for my intelligence. As they began to shun me, I became quite lonely and withdrew to my room and my computer to ease the pain.
I had a few friends, and they made life a little brighter, but I was still unhappy and felt so bad about how I looked, also dumbing myself down so people would like me. By the time I was 18, nature helped me out. I grew into my body, and suddenly I wasn’t fat anymore, but that chubby little kid was still there in the back of my mind.
The young, hurt child inside of me kept me insecure about my looks, as well as forced me to play dumb, with the fear that I’ll lose friends and be lonely again if I was perceived to be too smart. I was failing school because I didn’t want to seem smart, I was failing at my love life because I had no self-confidence, and I started to believe that nothing other than bleakness awaited me in my future.
Lucky for me, I managed to pull myself out of the mire and learned a few ways to boost my self-confidence. I’m now happy, married and have a career that I love. I'm also blessed with many friends who love me for who I am. It’s now my turn to help those who might still be having problems with their own self-confidence by showing you a few methods to boost it.
First, you should identify what you’re good at: We are all good at one thing at least, so find what you can do well. You might not be the best in that field, but as long as you do what you do well, you can improve and take pride in your expertise.
 Try expressing yourself through a form of art you like –
this is a real confidence booster and a great way to meet
like-minded people. Friends who share your interests can
make you feel more accomplished and push you forward.
If you can’t think of anything you’re good at, think of
something you’d like to do – then go and do it! It doesn’t
matter if you succeed or fail, trying is the most important step!
Once you’ve taken that first step, you’ll be amazed at how much better you feel, and your confidence will start to grow.
Second, you must take pride in your good qualities: Yes, being humble is important,
but if you’re good at something, don’t be embarrassed about it. Celebrate it and be happy
that you possess such qualities – they make you a better person. Remember – you can take
pride in your accomplishments and behavior while still retaining your humility.
If you start doubting yourself because of one weakness or another, remember that you
have good qualities and strengths, and those are the things that define you, rather than
your weaknesses.
Third, identify your insecurities: What do you think is holding you back? Is it that little voice in the back of your head? The way you look? Something you’re ashamed of? Find whatever it is that’s dragging you down and write it on a piece of paper. By giving it a name and writing it down on a piece of paper, you make it a tangible object. Next, TEAR THE PAPER UP! This is a psychological trick that makes your brain think that you’re ripping up the actual weakness.
 Next, talk about it: Find a loved one or a friend that you trust and bare your soul. Sharing lightens the burden, and another person can offer perspective, pointing out things you might have missed. This is what friends and family are for! Even if that person can’t help you solve the problem, just talking about it can help.
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